Are there any silver linings within bipolar disorder?

If I could wave a magic wand and be healed of bipolar disorder, I would wave it without a second’s thought. Some people say they would miss the highs, some say they couldn't live without the creativity and drive that the illness sometimes brings. I am not like those people. I would rid myself of this illness in a heartbeat if I had the magic want. Alas, I don’t have such a wand. However, rather than be beaten down by one of life's challenges, after many years I have come to the conclusion that challenges are a part of being human. They seem to be built into the fabric of life. So, for me, it has been about doing my best to face up to the challenges which life throws at me. We may not desire them, but very few of us escape them. In this blog I would like to share a list of traits that have developed from the challenges that bipolar disorder has thrown my way. 

Courage: 

A wise person once said, 

"Courage is not an absence of fear. Courage is being afraid and doing what is right anyway." 

We may think we are brave, we may think we are a coward, but until our back is pinned against a wall we don’t know how courageous we are. Many people discover that they are far braver than they could have possibly imagined. Many of us have discovered a bravery we never knew existed. Many of us have had to. Bravery is not the easiest word to properly define, but perhaps a fair definition would be that being brave is staying true to our values even when we are faced with losing a great deal because of this. Bipolar took me to places I would never have wanted to go, but also left me with a deep, inner courage and willingness to live my life to the full. I believe this is the case for tens of thousands of people with bipolar and I commend them for it.

 

Humility: 

As a young man, I could be very arrogant. In fact, being cocky was a really big part of my personality. Bipolar changed this. There are few things more humbling than being battered by a mental illness and the challenges that come with it. Bipolar’s battering went a long way towards diminishing my arrogance, showing me that I don’t have the right to judge other people (even though I sometimes do), and that I always have something to learn from other people. In short, it has made me a nicer and better version of myself.

 

Priorities: 

In and of itself, ambition is not a bad thing, but if it gets a tight hold of me, it can lead to chaos. Ambition can lead to great achievements but doesn’t usually bring happiness in of itself. By its nature, ambition is dissatisfied with the status quo. It wants things to change. It wants life to be different. It wants to impress.

By “failing” in critical areas, most notably my career, I was given the opportunity to let go of the chains of ambition that had pushed me for as long as I can remember. 

I still enjoy achieving goals and aspiring to do great things, but I am not lost in these goals. They are more like fun, stimulating pastimes. I love riding my motorbike, giving talks, teaching meditation, and doing repairs around the house. I don’t need to climb Mount Everest or have an impressive job to feel alive.

 

Peace: 

Ironically, I may have found peace because I have bipolar. The illness gave me a great incentive to put my energy into cultivating peace and spurred me towards finding my spiritual path. It gave me many good reasons to try to free myself from emotional suffering and the pain inflicted by my mind. Had life gone my way, and had I been born with a steady mind, would I have sought out peace? Probably not.

 

Acceptance: 

By being forced to accept the unacceptable, I have learned to embrace life the way it is. Which means that, most of the time, I have stopped fighting and begrudging the life I have been given. I still have my moments when I get frustrated or feel disheartened, but these days they are rare. I am better at going with the flow and being sensitive, not just to what I want to happen, but to what life wants to happen. This has brought me much peace of mind.

 

Compassion: 

Through the suffering that comes with bipolar, I have developed a depth of compassion for others. I learned that everyone has their challenges and their disappointments, and it is better to meet people with love, kindness and honesty than to judge them.

By Oliver Seligman (author of Befriending Bipolar: a patient's perspective).