The Positive Side of Bipolar Disorder

It took me a long time to reach a place where I could genuinely see what positives might have come from having bipolar disorder. I'm not here to put a fake positive slant on what is, let's be honest, a very horrible condition. But, in a media drowned out by bad news, I want to take a bit of time to share some of the silver linings that I have found in bipolar disorder. I am not someone who forces themselves to be positive, but I think this is an area that deserves more attention.

Growing up, I remember my Dad saying to me, "Ollie, no one ever said it was going to be easy." 

He was refering to life, and his words used to frustrate me. But it turned out that he had a point. My life, and I am guessing yours, hasn't been as easy as we would have hoped or expected. 

I wonder if anyone's life really is? 

These days, it seems naive to think that life should be without challenges. It seems a bit "cloud cuckoo land" to expect to cruise through our time on planet earth without facing problems and disappointments, hardships. I don't believe our purpose on earth is simply to have a decent career, fall in love, make some friends or have some cool experiences and then quietly fade away. I think there is more to life than that. I think we can grow, develop and evolve from the challenges. I know that's not always the approach any of us want to hear while in the midst of a huge problem, but when the dust has settled, perhaps it's true?

So, without further ado. Here are some of the positives that have come from bipolar for me.

1. It pushed me to find peace:

The intense suffering I went through during episodes of deep depression, mania, and psychosis forced me to really look at myself. The episodes stopped me in my tracks, ruining my life for months at a time. Even the aftermath provided me challenges.  After a few years, the suffering made me want peace. I really wanted peace. Even though I didn't fully understand what peace meant, because I so rarely experienced it, I knew I didn't have it and I WANTED IT! Acknowledging that desire changed my priorities.

I began making decisions based on what I thought might make me happier. I learned to meditate (Ascend). I didn't try to get an impressive, "rat race" job. I became an Ishaya teacher. Someone who has dedicated my life to finding peace and helping people do the saem. I travelled the world teaching The Ishayas' Ascension and I can honestly say that I have found the peace I was searching for. My mind is generally quiet and contented, and there is an aliveness to everyday life, even the boring things! Bipolar, in a strange way, set me on that journey.

2. It forced me to look after myself:

Growing up I was one of those kids who ran around getting hurt, falling out of trees and breaking bones. Like many of us, I didn't learn to look after myself until well into my adult life. For the first 20 years of bipolar, I didn't look after myself any better. I took my medication, but that was about it. Over time I matured, the medication side effects, bipolar and life began to push me into acknowledging that I wasn't immortal. I needed to take better care of my body and mind.

I've had to think carefully about what nourishes me, what I do with my time, how I stay as well as I can be. Simple questions, but questions I had never thought about. For me, the ketogenic diet has been particularly transformative in helping to stabilise my mood. But who I spend time with, what activities genuinely make me feel good, having a spiritual path, helping others, laughing, and filling my life with more love have been game changers. Perhaps I would have ended up looking after myself even without bipolar. Who knows? But it has certainly given me an incentive to do so.

3. It made me a more compassionate person:

I don't wish suffering on anyone. But there is no doubt that when we do suffer, many of us become more empathetic towards others. We understand people's struggles in a way we simply couldn't before. We become better people.

I sometimes see the opposite in public life. People who have cruised through life without real hardship can often lack genuine compassion for others. The law of karma is not taught much in the West. In Christianity there is the concept of "reaping what we sow," but it is not a big part of christian teaching. For me the concept of karma makes perfect sense. If we give, love, help, support, are honest, integrous and enthusiastic when we can be, of course our life improves over time. By becoming more compassionate and improving the lives of others, our own lives improve too.

4. It showed me what is important:

Bipolar forced me to get my priorites straight. It made me sit down and ask myself some big questions: what do I actually want to do with my life? Why am I here? What gives me a sense of purpose? What makes my life feel meaningful?

These are questions that many people ask themselves, but many people don't. I think a lot of people are so stuck in the details of life, the everyday distractions and business, that they don't have the time to stop and look at themselves. Perhaps it's easier to just plough on. Having bipolar meant I had no choice but to confront these questions. As a result, my life has deepened considerably, and I have grown as a person in ways I don't think would otherwise have happened. That depth brings a real richness to my life, and for that I am grateful.

5. Bipolar forced me to grow up:

If you spend any time online you'll notice that there are plenty of people in their forties, fifties, and sixties who, emotionally speaking, haven't really grown up. They react impulsively, easily take offence, and are largely ruled by an immature inner world. I was like that too. I was completely governed by my reactive, immature mind.

Living with bipolar disorder knocked my world sideways and forced me to grow up. It forced me to start seeing things differently. Suffering can, of course, make people bitter and closed. But for many of us it changes us profoundly for the better. There's real truth in the saying, 

"If it doesn't kill you, it makes you stronger."

If you're reading this, the chances are you've probably suffered to some degree. And whilst escaping suffering is always the goal, if we have suffered, we may as well use it for good, for our own benefit and for the benefit of those around us.

by Oliver Seligman (author of Befriending Bipolar: a patient's perspective) has a Youtube channel called:

@livingbetterwithbipolar       Here is the link: https://www.youtube.com/@livingbetterwithbipolar